*This was written about two years after the passing of my Mother, I shared it on a social media site but never for the world to see and I feel it is time.*
Very rarely do I stand up and state my religious views, mainly because those are my personal beliefs and I hate conflict, but this morning I am going to share with you my view on several topics since all the buzz lately is gay marriage and the rights that are being fought for.
Before I jump behind the pulpit and start preaching I want to share something with you.
As most all of you know my Mama passed away not quite two years ago. The pain is still unbearable at times but now for the most part there is just a longing that I can’t satisfy.
At the time of her departure I had to make some very tough choices and do some quick thinking without her by me for guidance.
One of the decisions was put entirely on me because I was her only child and it was a matter she felt very strongly about.
Organ donation; because Mom had been so sick there was very little she could donate. Minutes and I mean minutes after her passing I had to decide on her behalf what to do. She was a firm advocate on giving anything and everything to others. I received the phone call and I shook with terror, this felt like a nightmare but I had to pull myself together enough to speak with the woman on the line who sought my response. She informed me that there was only one thing they could take from Mama.
Her eyes.
It made me feel like projectile vomiting at the mere thought of this all, but it was time sensitive so I couldn’t run from it, I had to straighten up and talk. With a shaky voice and weary soul I answered the questions the lady very carefully asked me. She was so kind to me, she represented the eye foundation and they needed to know certain things before they could proceed, so I answered all of her questions as best I could.
I barely remember any of what she said, and after giving her my number again and email address I finally ended the call. I sat down and bawled and howled like a lost child.
I knew what I had done was right but it seemed so fast.
Now let us fast forward a few days later. My phone rang again, I heard the kind voice again and she seemed to almost be crying, this conversation I will never forget. “Teresa, I just wanted to let you know, because of your Mother, today a successful transplant was done and someone has sight for the first time in their life.” After that I cried so hard I couldn't tell you what else was said. Now let us advance a year later.
I am casually scrolling through my email and I see an email from the foundation. I opened and as I put my crying eyes into my hands and wept I finally understood it all. “Dear Teresa Hardister, we want to inform you that the recipient of your Mother’s donation would like to meet you in the future, this does take some time and because of certain rules and regulations we must ask you in advance if you would like to meet with this person. Teresa you will be glad to know their transplant was a complete success and if you desire, you will be given the chance to look into your mother’s eyes again.”
Again with the crying, I prayed out loud and gave thanks for such a gift. I haven’t met the person, who carries Mama’s soft baby blues yet, but very soon I will have the miracle of seeing her eyes again, and the kindness she gave even after her life had ended.
Now you are thinking what in the world does this have to do with anything concerning gay marriage and my take on certain biblical beliefs.
When I answered the Eye Foundation’s questions, never once did they ask me about Mom’s sexual preference “Did she have gay eyes?” or did they tell me the sexual preference of the person receiving her eyes. They asked medical history, general info and then some very random questions about who she was. NOT one time did they ever ask for her stance on it, her religion or her preference on anything, not just sex, they didn't care if she was a Baptist or Methodist, a democrat or republican, if she was vegan or meat eater, if she ever cheated or lied;what her income level was, they asked about what kind of person she was.
I was brought up with the belief that we do not judge, under no circumstances do we pass judgment on another human being because of their choices or lifestyle. I have tried very hard to instill this in my children, we are to help others. We are not to cast stones and hate, we are to reach out a helping hand and give, guide and live our lives with a kind heart in order to set an example to all who meet us.
I have taught my sons that even when they come under fire; to hold fast to their beliefs and help others never giving concern to what others might say or think of them.
If we live our lives standing above everyone pointing fingers down, then there you have a hypocrite my friends.
None of us and I repeat none of us are without faults, sins and things we have done in our lives that could raise an eyebrow or cause a stir.
Few things anger me to the point of actual confrontation but a hypocrite will surely get me riled up.
I ask you all this question, have you ever lied? Have you ever cheated on your spouse, either in your thoughts or actions? Have you ever coveted something someone else had? Have you ever talked trash about someone without giving them yet another chance? None of us are without sin and fault and if we are going to pass out huge scarlet letters to the gay community to wear and disrupt their lives just as it did to Hester Prynne, then every single one of us better whip out our letters too and wear them upon our chests. C is for cheater, L is for liar, I need not explain further.
And on that note, I will include race as well. We all have red blood, we are all made the same, and just a neat fact here, When I wrote Uniquely Nobody, I told you about a little boy being the only person who would take a chance and be my friend when I entered public school, what I never told you was, that young man is African American, why did I leave it out? It didn't matter, he walked up to the new girl, the temporary outcast and reached out a hand to let me know I wasn't alone. His color, creed or background made no matter.
Jesus Christ walked among the lepers, not looking down upon them, but giving his hand to heal, help and befriend.
Our society needs a healing, a good old fashioned Southern soul revival and a reminder what the good book says about it. This a scripture I carry with me daily, because It reminds me how to live, how to conduct myself with people who may not be like me, but their blood is just as red as our Lord and Savior’s.
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.” Matthew 7:3-5
I want you all to take that in, and even if we disagree on religious beliefs, it clearly can be a guide to anyone. Judge not. I could care less what you believe, what you do, it is not my place to damn you, I will however stand beside you, because it is what is right.
When I am finally given the honor of meeting the person who is now seeing the world for the first time because of the gift of sight my Mama gave them, I will not care if they are gay, straight, what color they are, if they have tattoos or ever had an affair. It isn't my place. I will hug that person and give thanks for the miracle I am receiving.
In closing, remember my point earlier, if we are going to be so cruel and mean, why don’t we all get a flaming red letter to sit upon our bosom telling the world our wrong doings and after wearing it a while, see how sick and cruel the world can be. We are not here to judge others and pretend we have never done anything that would be looked down upon. Let people live, let them have peace, and if you think you can’t change the world, you are dead wrong, it starts within yourself.
Here are my thoughts.
Teresa
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