I have written
this in my mind many times, and each time, I backspace. I sit back
and feel discouraged because what I want to say isn't forming as it
should.
Let me begin by
saying this: in this day and time, when we are offended by everything
from the color of the grass to whatever popular trend leads people to
rise up and be angry, I am possibly going to offend some, and I am
fine with that. I am so thankful for my right of free speech.
I could
possibly lose friends here, or make you mad, and if so, I am not
sorry. I speak from my soul and there is no apology needed for being
honest and upfront. So, with that disclaimer, I will continue.
I am a Christian--
there, I said it. It's out there. I believe in Jesus Christ, I
believe in God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.
Now,
I am sure I lost a few readers right there, but I do hope you will
continue.
I think that when
you proclaim that, many people assume you are a freak, a weirdo, or
someone who is to be avoided because it might rub off on them-- I
hope it does! I won't shove religion down your throat, but I won't
sit back and watch the world crumble, either. People have the liberty
of spouting out obscene remarks, or whatever else they wish, so to
not stand up for what I believe and say what I stand for would be a
shame.
I had the privilege
of attending Christian school in my very formative years, and in
those years, I learned many things. However, my real education came
as I entered a world that wasn't filled with people who had the same
beliefs as me.
I have come to learn
that you often feel shunned for standing for Christianity. I have
seen it firsthand-- I've been mocked and left out, and hey, that is
totally alright. I won't judge you for believing differently and not
tolerating my own beliefs. I will keep on living my life and doing
what I do. I have had many people scoff at me when my reply to
hardships is, “I gave it to God, he will handle it.” I don't say
that to just have something to say. I do give it to Him, and in my 42
years on this earth, he has never let me down. He always provides.
I am not ashamed,
either. My Christianity is not a scarlet letter. I am, however, here
to clear up the myths. Being a Christian is a personal relationship
with God, one that does not make me someone I'm not. I wear
flip-flops, I act silly, I cook normal food, and I make mistakes--
plenty of them. Thankfully, because I have accepted Christ, I am
forgiven for my mistakes and imperfections. I am flawed, and nothing
close to who I need to be and who I want to be.
I teach best by
painting a picture for you, so I will tell you a story about myself
when I was about nine or ten years old. I was standing in our little
country church, barely tall enough to see over the pews, my Mama and
Mimi on either side of me. The pastor asked if anyone had a song
request for the congregation to sing. I felt overcome with emotion at
the beauty the sun shining through the stained glass, and the sight
of my family there with me. I felt empowered and uplifted-- I jumped
to my feet and screamed out, “Number 64!”
The pastor chuckled
and smiled at me. He already knew that “Blessed Assurance” was my
favorite hymn, but I think he also saw a transformation before him.
As we all stood to sing, I felt chills. I looked to my left, and
there beside me were the two most influential women in my life
letting their tears flow freely. I didn't really understand why they
were crying, but I felt overwhelmed with a joy and light in my heart
that I have come to carry with me until present day. I felt like
shouting with excitement that day. I felt like singing that song the
rest of the afternoon, and come to think of it, I probably did. To
this day, when I hear that hymn, I sing off-key with huge tears in my
eyes and a feeling takes over. Suddenly, I know my life may not be
perfect, but I am safe and I am secure, no matter what comes at me.
Now, I bet you are
thinking that I have always walked the straight and narrow, and been
some angel my whole life, always taking God's word without question.
Oh, to the contrary! I have been down the road to places I shouldn't
have been. I have questioned God, and even been angry at Him.
When I
lost Mom, I was so hurt, but I also was so angry-- angry at the
world, at life, and at God. I didn't even know how to process what I
was feeling because she wasn't here. Even though she had prepped me
for this before she passed, and told me not to be mad, and to not run
from God, but to seek him in my grief, I didn't listen, and I paid
for it.
I was angry for quite a while, and finally, my husband set me
straight. He told me the truth point-blank. God knew when she was
born when she would leave this earth, and that Mama had taught me all
she had. Her time was over, but she had taught me what she needed to,
spiritually as well as in so many other ways-- and my anger wasn't
right. Slowly I could see, and it took his words and the words of my
youngest son to get me back on track again. I promise you, if I can
come back with a vengeance, anyone can!
I am here to tell
you my friends, there is no shame in believing. We have been given
life beyond this earth. It is a gift-- a gift that I wish so many
had, but they refuse it. I wish everyone could feel the yearning, the
urge to shout it out. Once you come to Christ, you can feel a peace
in yourself that you can't ever deny. I am shouting it out! I should
have done it before now, but here I am nonetheless, shouting it out,
singing Blessed Assurance to the top of my lungs! Sing with me! Where
is your fire? Let him take your life in his hands, and you will find
a fire burning in you that can not be put out by anything, as long as
you trust and keep yourself firmly planted in your faith.
My Mimi used to
always tell me to remember one thing, and it has stuck with me all
these years. I feel like I should pass it on to you, as well. She
told everyone she met, whether they were Christians or not, that if
you call upon the name of the Lord, even in your final moments, you
WILL be saved. Isn't that amazing? I have given that so much thought.
What a gift, that with all our flaws and faults, if we call upon him,
we are saved! Think about that: you, me, everyone out there-- if you
call him, he will be there. He is only that one call away.
I am not here to
shove my words in your face, as I said before-- but I will tell you
this: to those who are rolling their eyes at my words, and those that
think I am off my rocker, God is real, take it or leave it. I hope
you choose Him, but I am also here to tell you that no science or
theory can explain the miracles I have witnessed in my life. I often
hear that miracles are fables or stories for children, and that is
totally not true. Miracles happen, and they didn't stop with Biblical
times. When Christ rose from the grave and ascended into Heaven, he
didn't give up his business of performing miracles and pack up shop.
In fact, I think he does more of that now than ever. He is trying to
get your attention, but he isn't going to knock you upside the head.
He is showing you, but the choice is yours.
I guess you could
say that I am coming out. I am coming out in my beliefs, and I am not
ashamed. I respect all people, and if you choose to laugh at me, or
stop being my friend, that is alright. I can tell you, however, to
think back to that little girl, singing her heart out. That is
Blessed Assurance, my friends, as she was covered in goose bumps, and
that is a feeling that nothing of this world will ever compare to.
I have come out, and
it feels so good. I hope my words touch at least one person, and if I
made you mad, then praise God, I hit a nerve and made you think. I am
pretty good at ruffling feathers, and I will keep doing it.
I am still the same
silly, flip-flop wearing Teresa that you know, but I am also a
Christian, and so thankful that I have done what Mimi said. I called
him, and he came, it is that simple. Being a Christian doesn't take
away from who I am, it only adds to me!
I love you all, and
I pray you will be blessed in all that you do. If you would like to
talk with me about this, feel free to message me. I want to see more
people receive this gift! SING WITH ME! COME ON… Let the revival
begin!
Teresa
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